Forgiveness isn't friend or foe

Forgiveness isn’t friend or foe,
it is an ally, an ally that waits in wonder,
and sometimes strikes too hard....
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I wrote this months ago during my morning writing/meditation time. I was free-writing about all the things I’d share with people ‘’if I had no shame.’’ I later shared all of them with a performance group I was part of and turned the whole thing into a song….
 
At the time I wrote and sang it, I didn’t know what ‘’strikes too hard’’ meant, but these last few days, forgiveness has been asking me to, well….forgive. I haven’t experienced it this way before though – but it’s like there is a "being" called "Forgiveness," and it’s led me to a door labeled “where I wasn’t given to.” And through that door... where I wasn’t loved, I wasn’t cared about, I wasn’t noticed or seen, that’s where I’m being told to walk. Not only to love, care, notice myself, but to love, care, and notice the ones who haven’t done that for me. I imagine people will comment about how we can't be loved where we don't love, etc... and sure, that's true AND plenty of times, I am schooled by another's way of loving me that teaches me how to love better. 
 
It burns, actually. Scares me a little. But I’m trusting and walking right into those burning arms, believing in myself and my intuition, that whatever burns off, was never meant to be there in the first place.