Bullshit

​On the topic of god giving us only what we can handle. Bullshit.
 
I am consistently given more than I can handle. As are most of the people I know. I get it, that statement is a source of comfort for some but it’s also a way for people to alienate from one another instead of leaning in to someone else’s unimaginable pain and being with them. Or being with our own unimaginable pain and letting someone else in. To be witnessed in our ugly, awful places.
 
Admitting we need someone to accompany us is brave. To share the intimacy that is life stretches us together rather than apart. There are poetic metaphors that speak of flowers and trees not crying when they fall or are cut or die. Really? What is the sweet sap of a maple?
 
One of my favorite teas is a leaf-bitten High Mountain Oolong. In the high mountains of Taiwan, cicadas bite the leaves and in response, the leaves produce a sweetness that is remarkable and mysterious. I love imagining the vulnerability of the leaf and the chomping of those little tree-hoppers. But even more, the fortitude of the leaf reminds me the best of me is the result of my pain and my struggle.
 
That my heart is constantly being formed by where I am sweetly kissed and bitterly bitten.
 
Being given more than we can handle is how God (the Universe, Spirit, Shakti…. whatever you believe as the larger creative force that couples with your beautiful creative force to soar) invites us connect with each other. Care about one another. Feel deeply for another. It’s about love. Deep, connected, devoted, love.
 
When we love deeply, we can’t throw lines at one another like, ‘’don’t worry, god wouldn’t give you more than you can handle.’’ Instead, we might dare to say, ‘’damn, that hurts like hell, I’ll walk with you’’ trusting, trusting, trusting….that in being and seeing another, we are cherishing that tender place in ourselves too.